I could hear my phone buzzing on my bedside table.
I lazily opened on eye and watched it vibrate itself in a circle. For a moment I thought about reaching for it but then decided against it. I closed my eyes tight and sighed happily; I was very warm and content buried under my blanket, my feet twisted in the sheets. I tried my best to ignore the annoying buzz and concentrate on the pillow I was clutching to my chest that still smelled like Bella.
She had been so careful to try not to wake me up when she slipped out of the bed this morning. I heard her quietly moving around the room putting her clothes on and sliding the window open. She thought I slept through the whole thing…but I didn’t. I almost sat up and told her not to fucking climb out the damn window but decided that she was being sneaky for a reason and I didn’t want to scare her. She was always going on about how she didn’t want things to get complicated, and she never went back for seconds, and she didn’t want things to get personal. Obviously intimacy was not her strong point so I understood that her making a quick exit was so she could avoid talking to me.
Honestly I was still shocked that she had come to me at all. I know my slip up on the beach had freaked her the fuck out and I had been completely prepared for her never to talk to me again. And then against all odds she came to my house and snuck into my bed. Her tears and her honesty had been proof to me that I was not just another dick for her to fuck; I meant something to her. I squeezed my pillow to my chest and inhaled deeply enjoying the faint lingering scent of her hair.
I heard my phone buzzing again.
I groaned and kicked my blanket off, struggling to untangle my legs from the sheets.
I swiped at the phone and glanced at the screen. It was a phone number I didn’t recognize.
“Hello?” I asked sleepily. I rubbed my face and ran my hand through my hair. I really needed a fucking haircut.
I didn’t hear anything in response at first. I was about to hang up when I heard a soft whimper.
“Hello?” I asked again becoming concerned. I scooted to the edge of the bed and strained to hear anything. I could only make out muffled sounds and rustling.
“Edward?” the voice was quiet and sounded strained but I recognized it immediately.
“Bella, what’s wrong?” I asked getting a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach.
“She tried to…she just…I couldn’t anymore…”
She started to cry again and couldn’t finish her sentence.
“Are you alone?” I asked starting to get pissed off. Who had fucked with her so badly that she couldn’t even talk to me? Bella was the strongest person I knew and for her to be completely broken like this meant something really messed up had just happened to her.
“Yes.” She managed to croak.
“Do you need me to come over?” I asked already searching through the dirty clothes on my floor for a pair of jeans.
“Please.” She begged softly.
“Ok I’m on my way. Just…don’t fucking move ok?”
I hung up the phone and got dressed as quickly as I could. I slid my shoes on and dashed out the door not even calling goodbye to my mom who was vacuuming the front room when I flew past her.
It took several tries to get the Volvo to start and I gave up a few times and seriously considered walking all the way there. Finally, after several minutes of me cursing and punching the dashboard the piece of shit sputtered to life. I really needed to get the thing fixed. Jake had been going on about some new girl at the reservation he had a boner for that fixed cars; I might as well give him the Volvo and have him bring it to her. Give him a reason to talk to her.
I drove much faster than I normally would have, cringing whenever the Volvo slid around the corners on almost completely bald tires. I kept my fingers crossed that I wouldn’t wreck or get pulled over before making it to Bella. Something in her voice sounded really off and my heart was in my throat as I slid to a stop in her driveway.
I slammed the car door shut, tripped on my own feet and stumbled towards the front door as fast as I could. I knocked on the door several times and when I got no answer tried the door knob. It was unlocked and the door swung open easily into a silent and seemingly empty house.
“Bella?” I asked tentatively glancing around the living room and stepping quietly into the kitchen.
I stopped at the foot of the stairs and listened. “Bella?” I asked again directing my voice up the staircase.
“I’m here.” Her voice was so quiet I barely heard her.
I took the steps two at a time not bothering to ask permission to come upstairs. There were two bedrooms and I saw that the door to the room nearest my left was partially opened. I slowly stepped forward and pushed it with my fist. It swung open silently and I poked my head in.
I saw her almost immediately. She was in a heap on the floor beside her bed. Her hair was a tangled mess and her eyes were puffy and red from crying. I stepped over to her and sunk down onto the floor beside her.
“What the hell happened?” I asked wanting to reach out and pull her into my arms but not wanting to cross any boundaries. I still wasn’t sure what the hell I was to her so until she made it perfectly clear I was playing it safe.
“Fucking, Katie.” Was all she said. She looked up at me for a moment and I saw tears well up in her eyes and spill over onto her cheeks. She immediately looked away hiding her face.
“What did she do?”
Bella just shook her head and refused to make eye contact. She laughed to try to ease the tension but it didn’t work. I just stared at her intently, wondering what Katie could have done to make Bella break like this.
“You don’t have to tell me. That’s ok.” I said to her finally.
“Fuck.” She pounded her left fist into her palm and popped her knuckles anxiously.”Fuck her.”
I didn’t ask questions I just sat there and waited for her.
She pulled her knees up to her chest and hugged them tightly. “I kicked her out.”
“You what?” I asked not hiding my surprise. She glanced up and me and laughed.
“Yeah. I know. I couldn’t believe it either. She crossed a line today and I wanted her out.”
“What happened?” I tried again now that she was slightly more talkative.
She rolled her eyes. “Ugggh. It’s so embarrassing.” She wiped the tears off of her cheeks and shook her head again looking thoroughly disgusted.
“She fucking seduced me.” Bella tugged her hand through her hair and watched me closely gauging my response.
I was not expecting that one.
“Um…what?” I stammered not sure what to do with that statement.
“She got pissed because I spent the night with you and she tried to convince me to leave you. She said you were bad for me and that having a relationship with you was going to do nothing but get me in trouble and you hurt. Then she broke out her fucking weed and then we were kissing and then she had her… she was…fuck!”
“You kissed her?” I asked feeling slightly hurt but not wanting to let it show. I was supposed to be impartial. I was supposed to be supportive and not the jealous boyfriend type and yet here I was fucking raging that someone else had kissed her.
“A little more than kissing.” She said seriously and I felt the pang of jealousy hit home again. She was my Bella. I wanted to be the only one allowed to touch her.
I cleared my throat. “So you got pissed?”
She nodded. “She was fucking messing with my head. Making me believe that the feelings I have for you are wrong. She wanted me to fuck her so that I would see that I didn’t need you.”
My head snapped up. Feelings? For me? Had I heard that right? I narrowed my eyes at her and reached for her hand. “I know this is hard for you Bella, but I know what I’m getting myself into. I understand that all this shit could go very bad for you and for me, but just try for me ok? Try to help me understand what you need.”
She rocked herself forward and threw herself at me. Her arms wrapped tightly around my neck her face buried in my shoulder. I held her tightly my heart singing happily. “Edward…” She whispered.
“I am falling for you.” She whispered these words to me so quietly they sounded like a sigh. “I’ve never..I don’t…this is really got me fucked in the head.”
“Don’t.” I said kissing her forehead. “Not right now ok? Don’t try to label this, or explain away what you are feeling. Just…just let me hold you and when you are ready…then we will talk. Even if you aren’t ready for a long time.”
“You would do that for me?” She asked in amazement. “You would just be with me without expecting me to be a stereotypical girlfriend? Because I can promise you I’d be a shitty fucking girlfriend.”
“No pressure Bella. I just want to spend time with you. I like spending time with you. And I mean that ok? We don’t need to be having sex for me to enjoy you.”
She pulled her head back slightly and studied my face. “No one has ever said that to me before.”
“Have you ever given someone the opportunity to say something like that?”
“Well, there you go.”
She slumped against me and sighed. “I can’t believe Katie is gone. We’ve been through a lot together…you know? It’s hard to just walk away from that without it totally messing with you.”
“I can’t even imagine.” I gently stroked her hair as she clung to me.
“Thank you for coming here.” She said after a moment of silence. “I didn’t have anyone else.”
“Thank you for thinking to call me. Where did you get my phone number from by the way?”
She laughed. “I’m sneaky cool like that.”
“No. I got it out of your phone this morning before I left your room.”
“Stalker much?” I teased poking her in the side.
“Yeah just a little bit. I’m not good at this whole dating thing. I have never asked someone for their phone number.” She giggled swiping at my hand.
“Baby steps.” I reminded her. “You wanna play COD?”
I knew that she needed to get her mind off of Katie and the only way I knew how to distract Bella other than fuck her stupid was to play Call of Duty. Although even I had to admit the two had a tendency to go hand in hand.
“Yeah.” She said eagerly nodding her head. She slid off of me and crawled over to her Xbox. I tried not to stare at her ass but it was extremely difficult because she was only wearing a thin pair of cotton panties. She reached for her controller and handed it to me.
“You don’t want to play?” I asked when I saw that she didn’t reach for her second controller.
“No. I just want to watch you. Is that ok? Can I just lay here with you?” Her expression was soft and pleading and my fucking heart just about melted.
“Yeah…babe you can do whatever you want.” She smiled at me and I smiled back. “I don’t have to play. We can watch a movie or something.”
“No. This is perfect. Keeps my mind occupied. Don’t be pissed when I start backseat driving though.”
I laughed. “I won’t.”
I scooted so that my back was leaning against her bed and I folded my legs underneath me. She lay down beside me and rested her head on my thigh. She was quiet as the game loaded and I hoped she was ok. I didn’t know what else to do for her other than to just be there.
Right away I got a message from Wolfboi asking me to join their TDM. I looked down at Bella. “You ok if I play with them?”
She nodded and lifted her hand. Dangling from her index finger was her wireless headset. I chuckled and put it on.
“Where are you at fucker?” I heard Jake ask right away. ”I tried to call your house and Esme said you bolted out the door about an hour ago.”
“Yeah I’m at Bella’s house.” I said hoping she didn’t mind that I told them. She didn’t seem to care she just watched the screen silently.
“Tell her to tell Katie hey from me.” Jacob said sounding slightly depressed. I had a feeling Katie had rocked his world and then left him for dead.
“Awww, did the sex kitten breaky your heart Jakey?” Emmett teased snorting with laughter.
“Shut up fucker.” Jake growled angrily. “At least I can get some pussy.”
“Not no more. She cut you off.” Jasper laughed. “You should’ve heard him Ed. That Katie chick blew him off so bad. His butt is super sore.”
“Back to trying to get the car girl to go out with you huh?” I asked hoping that this line of conversation would lead to me getting my car fixed.
“Who? Charli?” Jacob asked.
I had no idea what the girls name was. “I guess.”
“She is so fucking hot.” He laughed. “She doesn’t give me the time of day so my hopes are not high.”
“Not like you to back down from a challenge.” I continued to prod him. I felt a tapping on my knee and Bella pointed at the screen.
“Campers.” She said in warning. I nodded and brushed the hair away from her face before returning to the game.
“Well, the Volvo has about had it. You wanna take it to her to fix? Maybe that will be your ice breaker.” I suggested and I heard Jasper and Emmett laugh.
“Might work.” Jacob said. I took that as a ‘yes, I’ll do it’.
“So are you and Bella like, fucking dating or what?” Emmett asked and I heard Jasper and Jacob go silent as they waited for my answer.
I swallowed, I had no idea what we were doing. “We are just hanging out.”
“So you are fucking each other’s brains out.” Jacob clarified.
“If that is what you want to think then sure.” I mumbled watching the TV closely. “Let’s play ok?”
All informal chit chat ended immediately and we all buckled down to play. Bella actually did pretty well and only interrupted a few times. Each time she did, she either saved my life or helped me make a kill so I wasn’t complaining.
We were nearing the end of the TDM when I felt Bella shift in my lap and her hand snake up over my thigh and rest on my crotch. She applied gentle pressure and even though I was trying hard to avoid having sex with her just because of the emotional roller coaster she had been through today, my cock had different ideas.
I heard her hum happily when she felt my erection pressing back against her hand.
She flipped over and knelt beside me. “I want to suck it.” She said loud enough for everyone to hear.
“Fucking suck what Edward?” Emmett asked his voice raising in pitch. “Suck what? What is she doing?”
“Emmett fuck off.” I growled. I felt Bella unzipping my jeans. “Bella, this isn’t a good…”
She gave me a dirty look. “You wanted to get my mind off of all the bullshit. Well this is how to get my mind off the bullshit. Plus watching all this game play is making me so fucking horny.”
I snorted with laughter.
“I’m being serious. This is like porn to me.” She glanced at the TV and back at me. She licked her lips.
“Do you want me to stop playing?” I asked watching her as she tugged the front of my jeans open.
“NO!” She yelled. “Don’t fucking lose your points.”
“Are you getting head right now?” Jacob asked laughing uncontrollably. “You are aren’t you?”
“No…now fuck off.” I said again slightly turned on and also embarrassed by the fact that Bella was about to wrap her mouth around my cock while I was playing Call of Duty with all of my best friends still online with me.
I was in fucking gamer heaven.